The great escape

Six months on and Chile has begun to seem like somewhere which never really existed. Incredible how time can heal... Back in June I was manically preparing and counting the days until we returned to some semblance of a normal life... It was strange, saying goodbye and in fact hard for the children although they have the good fortune of being young enough to live in the present and dwell little on the past. We spent the summer months decompressing in the reassuring familiarity of the children's grandparents' comfortable house before setting up our new home and new life in the semi-rural setting we once aimed for before, swapping the majestic but untamed Andes for the humbler, infinitely cosier Chilterns... As the girls and I stood on the pavement outside our still strangely new-feeling home, the dust-covered container which had travelled overseas all the way from Santiago via Valparaiso and ending up at the port of Tilbury before journeying by road to our new abode, heavy with all our worldly goods, felt like an old friend and looked a little how I felt myself ie battered, tired but somehow resilient... It was a sight that will stay with me for a long time and definitely symbolised a moment in our lives.
That was four months ago. The girls have now all but finished their first term at their British state primary school and have literally loved every minute. Even I have taken the first tentative steps at a return to some worthwhile working activity and am full of the joys of making my contribution to the world outside my wonderful but limited existence as wife, mother, homemaker... Things feel right. Schools are such stimulating, modern and exciting places to be here. Healthcare is available and free for all, a concept which people take for granted sometimes, not realising that the rest of the world is far from where we are as regards well-developed civilisation and basic human rights. It is cold in December and the days are short, all adding to the authenticity of a proper Christmas this year. My friends and family are around and nearby as we are to them, no longer isolated by continents and hemispheres not to mention seasons and timezones. I wake up every morning absolutely delighted to be here, back where we belong...
What do I miss about Chile? The weather has to be in top position. Incredibly mild and short winters, long, warm summers and always comfortable conditions for sleeping and so forth... Plus the sun, its light and its warmth. Never having to use a tumbledrier nor even attempt to dry clothes indoors. The ubiquity and abundance of avocados. Wonderful Sauvignon Blanc at very reasonable prices. But things I can actually live without... if I like. Chile was an adventure in every sense of the word but also very hard work at times. As for the girls, they still recall their school/nursery, friends and teachers, but are swiftly forgetting it all too which is a shame. Every now and then one of them remembers something and we all laugh, a little incredulously at times, did that really happen and were we really there? Does that world really exist or was it an elaborate dream, just like Dorothy had in the Wizard of Oz? There's no place like home...

Full circle

Last week marked the end of term for DD1 hence a parent-teacher "conference" was scheduled. Her teacher was very direct and clearly didn't want to waste any time chatting but all was reported to be well much as had been expected. I still don't feel particularly aware of what goes on at school other than that all parties seem content with the status quo. In spite of the school's gloomy anachronistic ambience, DD1 has in fact been very happy, forming solid friendships and learning to read and write during her time there which is more than enough to satisfy me at this stage. She has also acquired Chilean Spanish in the most natural way possible as well as considerable cultural knowledge, numeracy skills and managed to lug an incredibly heavy rucksack to and from school every day... She may well be trailing behind in English spelling and writing but by way of compensation has learnt joined-up handwriting, loops and all. It's not quite what you'd get in a sub-standard state school in the UK (according to The Economist) but she's still young enough to catch up and the experience of living in South America for two years is probably a fair swap for anything she may have missed out on back in the twenty-first century...

Much the same can be said for DD2. Often she has lamented the fact that she goes to a Spanish-speaking nursery and not an English-speaking one, choosing to remain "as quiet as a mouse" for as long as possible while slowly but surely absorbing everything around her... She has gained an extraordinary level of confidence linguistically and culturally as well as producing enough artistic creations to sink the Titanic. Not to mention her experience of presenting to the class (this week it's seashells)... It's probably been very different to nursery in the UK but at her age being with other children and having fun are all that counts. The fact that she can also recite poems in Spanish, dance the tango and knows all about the glories of Chilean history are of course all a bonus...
As for me, I've learnt Spanish too, albeit not as well nor as naturally but I have had a good go, aided mainly by my very patient and eternally encouraging teacher. Not sure what else I have achieved apart from visiting some beautiful and far-flung places, surviving in an alien culture and always feeling like something wasn't quite right... Now my days as ama de casa are well and truly numbered as we prepare for our impending return to the UK. To use an analogy my children might understand, I feel a little like Jo in the Magic Faraway Tree, who visits the land of Topsy-Turvy and ends up walking upside down on his hands while his friends remain the right way up. After spending a while like this he eventually gets a reprieve and is allowed to return the right way up again, vowing to himself that he has in fact had enough exciting adventures and will not be visiting any more of the fascinating but unpredictable lands at the top of the Faraway Tree, however tempting they may seem...

Stand by your man

One month of the holidays left until school reopens and we aren't actually doing too badly. The girls are enjoying the long epicurean days and it must be said so am I. I am pleasantly surprised at how well they are playing together although plenty of fighting goes on too...often about toys or dolls' clothes. It's definitely been a bonding period as Santiago slows down and empties for the summer while school and nursery seem like a distant memory.
Last week we were invited to DH's department's end-of-year party, an event held in the university grounds for academic staff and students alike-- plus entourage such as ourselves. The students had gone to a great deal of trouble, not just by setting up and decorating stalls and even a barbecue serving choripan (sausage in a bread roll) and anticuchos (brochettes) amongst other delights but also by erecting a sophisticated sound system with amplifiers and at least two lap-tops providing the soundtrack of non-stop music tailored for a range of tastes and age-groups. Spirits were high, wine and beer flowed and the atmosphere was generally good despite some minor scuffles marring the end. The children amused themselves, especially by exploring the grounds while some of us indulged in some uninterrupted adult conversation. Inevitably I was asked about how I had settled in to life in Chile, what my impressions were and whether or not I was working at the moment...probably about a dozen times. Needless to say my answers became more expansive and less guarded as the Sauvignon Blanc went down...
Which brings me on to an issue I have been wanting to address for a while but haven't yet found the right moment, namely that of the Trailing Spouse. At first it was a novelty and of course a privilege, not to have to work and following one's husband around the world while also busily taking care of domestic matters and the lion's share of the childcare. Isn't that what all women did once, I wonder to myself, and many still do even in our so-called most developed cultures, at least for a few years while the children are small. Not so in Chile, where I and others like me are the exception and very much the minority. I hardly ever see Chilean mothers with their children here during the day apart from at weekends; usually families employ the ubiquitous and strictly apron-clad figure of the Nana, a robust all-encompassing home-help whose tasks may comprise anything within the home but also include looking after their patrons' children. I suppose their "mistresses" haven't had to up sticks and move to the other side of the world but still it's food for thought as I am surrounded by an army of apron-wearing women in parks, around the pool and in the communal gardens, some of whom I can't help feeling probably don't care much for the spoilt brat(s) in their charge but who will put up with anything for 10,000 Chilean pesos (approximately US$20) for an entire day's work... As for us Trailing Spouses, we do feel a bit isolated at times but of course have to look at the positives such as travelling to a new country/continent/hemisphere, learning a new language, spending time with one's children and thinking about going back to work...

Twelfth Night

It was not without some sadness but also with a good deal of relief that we dismantled our eco-tree today and put away our Christmas decorations in readiness for perhaps a proper winter celebration next year. Despite our best efforts it hasn't really seemed like Christmas this year either though Loving Grandmother's presence certainly added to the mood and helped us to feel it was a special time of year. The children were delighted with their stockings and various bits and pieces, enjoying in particular the swimming on Christmas Day and around, although DD1 surprised me more than once by saying that for her too it didn't seem like Christmas without the cold. It all seemed to be over in a trice as there were no extra bank holidays in lieu and the working week commenced again on Monday 26 December.
New Year's Eve was an interesting moment of cultural confusion as we took advantage of LG's babysitting potential and headed out, DH and I, to sample and savour the last night of the year in Chile's capital city. No-one had told us (nor had we asked) that the centre of the city was officially closed until after midnight on New Year's Day, thus we wandered around forlornly from barrio to barrio, being glared at by mean-looking carabiñeros for a worrying while in eerily quiet streets, searching for signs of life and anywhere serving even a glass of wine. Eventually we realised what was going on (seeing only disappointed tourists in a similar situation) and headed for the more "civilised" outskirts of the city where we eventually found hotels defying (or exempt from) the evening curfew and settled down for a four-course meal surrounded by rich and/or fat fellow diners. By eleven thirty we had finished and were stuffed to the gills, ready to take to the streets and begin saluting our fellow Santiaguinos... The streets were still desolate, completely deserted and Santiago had never been as empty. We began our long walk home, passing the midnight mark en route which was atmospheric for the lack of traffic, people and dogs for once... It felt like a metaphor for our existence here, DH and I alone in an alien world, always against the tide but together in a strange country, continent, hemisphere and culture...
So it is 2012 and a new year thus a time of renewed hope and optimism. Here in Chile the economic recession is not really an issue although there is a huge discrepancy in how people live hence a constant feeling of dissatisfaction for those of us used to a more even society. However one can only hope their turn will come too...
Meanwhile LG's departure has been softened by two exciting prospects: DD1's first wobbly tooth plus the potential arrival of La Befana, Italy's equivalent of the Three Wise Men who travels around the world on Twelfth Night, bringing sweets to good children and lumps of coal to the bad...

Deck the halls with boughs of...

...asparagus? Strawberry plants? Sunflowers? Certainly no real holly to be found here in an increasingly blazing summer in Chile, although oddly enough many of the northern hemisphere's Christmas traditions persist despite their apparent incongruity with the meteorological season. Thus we find model snowmen adorning people's gardens, depictions of reindeer pulling sleighs and plenty of Father Christmases dressed up in shopping malls or climbing up buildings. Last Saturday in Jumbo, our local supermarket, many of the staff were dressed as Father Christmas or his elves as "White Christmas" crooned out overhead to get us in the mood, the air-conditioning turned up full blast while outside the temperatures approached 32°C.
In a way it doesn't seem quite so strange this year as we've been through it before; indeed we are managing to recreate a festive atmosphere reasonably successfully this time. Perhaps it helps that we are in our own home with all our own belongings including three boxes of Christmas decorations acquired over the years... As DD1 broke up for an almost three-month-long summer holiday last week, we immediately set to work on our eco-tree and have now an interesting cardboard sculpture on our terrace which has been painted green and decorated with our lighter Christmas ornaments. We have made and illustrated cards, wrapped presents for teachers, made paper snowflakes and of course attacked the Advent calendars with great enthusiasm. One week of the school holidays gone, ten more to go... Meanwhile DD2 has been valiantly soldiering on at her nursery, lured in part by the prospect of a visit from Father Christmas himself, puzzlingly here in Chile referred to as "el viejito pascuero"... However tomorrow is her last day, with Spanish-language carols in the evening an invitation we cannot refuse...
A performance of the Nutcracker last weekend helped to conjure up some Christmas magic with both girls mesmerised by the dancing, the story, the scenery and of course the music. Unfortunately there was no live orchestra but a decent recording which was however inexplicably interrupted every now and then for some very impromptu editing. Another Chilean moment...

Green parrots, stray dogs and starched aprons

Yesterday during a mundane trip to the supermarket to do the weekly bumper shop while gazing upwards at the glorious seasonal colours on offer I happened to spot a bright green parrot flying overhead and diving over a wall. Peeping through the gate on the corner we saw the enclosed courtyard was full of the creatures, all vivid pea-green with bluish wings and tails, a sight one doesn't often see back home while nipping to Tesco... It reminded me of the sense of wonder of being in a new land, an effect which has worn off a lot recently as we become more and more accustomed to our not-so-new surroundings. However two other aspects of everyday life which were apparent at the beginning of our adventure have also become "normal" but may be worth mentioning at this point and these are stray dogs and starched aprons (not together but often in close proximity for their ubiquity). Back in the centre of Santiago stray dogs were almost as numerous as the various street-traders occupying patches of territory outside metro stations or calmly wandering alongside pedestrians as they went about their daily business. At first our reaction was one of extreme vigilance in case of aggression (especially at child-level) but we soon realised the dogs were and are mainly benign animals, previously someone's pet but now turned loose to find their own fortune (or not). There seems to be a mutual tolerance between human and dog which would be encouraging were it not for the hygienic and humanitarian implications plus there is sometimes the odd canine creature who doesn't quite seem to be man's best friend...

As for the starched aprons, these belong to the army of workers in the service industry, otherwise known as "nanas" and usually women employed as domestic helps by the classes who can. What surprised me most was the strict adherence to the uniform, of various colours and cuts but generally checked and buttoned over the shoulder. It has since been explained to me that it is for clarity of position although it does feel a bit Upstairs, Downstairs for the twenty-first century. But that's Chile for you...